Monday, October 15, 2012

Congregational Care for Clergy: Reducing Vocational Burnout


Congregational Care for Clergy: Reducing Vocational Burnout
by Rev. Amy C. Little, M.Div, D.Min

Clergy burnout is a serious issue that is acknowledged by pastors, denominational leaders and congregations alike, however, the onus of responsibility for preventing it seems to be placed solely upon the individual pastor.  There is no disputing that pastors could do a better job concerning self care, setting boundaries, taking days off and using vacation and continuing education time to care for self and spirit, but are there any ways that disciples in the local parish can care for their pastoral leader as well?  After all, the parishioners of any given congregation have a definite stake in their pastor’s health and well being.  A calm, rested, peaceful pastor will be better able to care for the flock they are entrusted with as well as preach, teach and lead the community of faith with greater vigor and passion.  The entire congregation receives benefits when the pastor is healthy rather than overworked, on edge, or at an emotional or spiritual breaking point.  

There are some key differences between stress and the more critical condition of burnout. According to Dr. Arch Hart, as cited in an article written by Rowland Croucher entitled “Stress and Burnout in Ministry,
” stress wreaks havoc on energy levels, creates increased reactivity, and produces a greater sense of urgency in one’s life. Burnout, on the other hand, is characterized by emotional damage and demoralization which manifest in a loss of hope and sense of worthlessness of life. When clergy burnout, rather just being stressed, they lose their sense of call, become mired in feelings of ineffectiveness, withdraw from others and become emotionally exhausted to the point of wanting to flee pastoral ministry altogether. Everyone experiences some stress and anxiety in life but when burnout occurs the potential for a pastor to leave the ministry altogether becomes a critical issue for the local parish, the denomination and the clergy person herself who will have to find another way to make living.

There are many factors that contribute to the long term erosion of a pastor’s health and well being.  It is not a situation that develops overnight by any means.  That is why it is important for parishioners to have an awareness of the pressures that their pastor is dealing with and to help facilitate the creation of an environment that cares for the pastor and keeps him healthy, just as he cares for the many needs of the people he serves.  One factor that is increasingly causing clergy to wear out emotionally and spiritually is modern technology.  With the increased use of cell phones (one estimate cites 85% of Americans have cell phones!) including the instant messages of texting, the pastor now more than ever before is “on call” all the time.  It is not uncommon amongst my colleagues to discuss at clergy gatherings how their cell phones ring or beep at all hours of the day and night.  Texting creates an even more urgent signal to pastors to answer immediately as lights flash on their phones signaling a message is waiting to be answered.  It might not even be anything important, such as a death in the family or an accident in the community, that seeks the pastor’s attention.  Rather, a question about Sunday’s readings, the time of an upcoming meeting, or a request to add a name to the prayer list.  Pastors often use social media such as Facebook to connect with friends and family. However, with this technology comes increased exposure as parishioners send messages asking for the attention to some matter in their life directly to the pastor’s in box.  This seems like it would be one place where pastor’s simply connect with those closest to them but instead these message infringe on their down time and put pressure on them to respond more quickly. The fading of boundaries between personal time and work time contributes to the erosion of a pastor’s sense of peace and infringes on precious family time. 

There are many expectations places upon clergy, some of which may be unrealistic, but exist all the same. Many congregations have the notion that it is the pastor’s role to go out and get inactives and get them re-engaged in the life of the faith family. The cold, hard reality is that American churches are shrinking in the twenty-first century.  The pastor is expected to fix this problem as well as draw in youth of all ages and keep them past confirmation. The problem is that there is no magic solution that the pastor can employ to bring people back to the fold or even to round up new people to attend worship. This is the work of the entire community yet the onus of responsibility, which deeply felt, is generally placed heavily on the pastor’s shoulders. 

Another issue that erodes a pastor’s wellness is conflict.  Conflict in the parish, whether it is between parishioners or barbs pointed at the pastor when members feel slighted, ignored or are unhappy with some aspect of the pastor’s performance, can wear down the self esteem and energy of even the most tireless clergy person.  Conflicts that encompass the denomination also have an impact on a pastor’s health and energy for the ministry.  They are often powerless to do anything to soothe the anxieties of all of the disciples in the parish.  One group or another will always be on the “losing” side in these arguments that are rarely a win-win for all involved.  

There are many other issues that occur in the parish that tend to suck the proverbial life right out of the minister but none seem to be as poignantly devastating as the blatant lack of respect for the office of the ordained ministry.  Culturally it is really no different for teachers, police officers, civic leaders and the like.  There are myriad reasons why this has come to be a new normal, however it remains a source of angst and pain for clergy who now have to “earn” respect over time rather than be accorded them simply by occupying the ministerial office.  It seems that if the church could do a better job in this one key area, making the pastor feel appreciated and valued rather than treating her like a paid employee who exists solely to keep people happy and free from inevitable conflict, then clergy would be noticeably healthier, happier in their God-called vocations, and last longer in parish ministry rather than dropping out in order to gain relief and heading back to the secular work force.  
Looking at Martin Luther’s explanation to the fourth commandment from the Large Catechism might shed some light on how a congregation can aid their pastor in living a healthier and more joyful life by honoring her as one who is appointed by God and sent to serve in this particular capacity in the name of Christ.  

The Fourth Commandment: Honor your father and your mother.  
What is this?
We are to fear and love God, so that we neither despise nor anger our parents and others in authority, but instead honor, serve, obey, love and respect them. (Small Catechism, Wengert Edition)

Luther identifies four kinds of fathers that are meant to be honored: birth fathers, the father of the family, civil leaders, and spiritual leaders. 

As mentioned above, a contributing factor to clergy burnout is society’s lack of trust and respect for those in positions of authority.  No longer, it seems, is the local pastor an authority on much of anything in the parish.  Everyone has access to a bible with study notes which may or may not reflect the local congregation’s theological traditions. Parishioners can watch television ministers preach before they arrive to Sunday worship at their local congregation and elevate that message above what their pastor preaches.  This disconnect can influence a disciple’s opinion about their own pastor’s theology as they miss the subtle nuances that one who has been trained in the tradition would readily identify.  The pastor is often no longer the most educated person in the parish nor one who is the best at management, finances, or organizational systems.  If this is the thinking of even some of the members of a congregation, that because there is always someone around who is “better” than the local pastor, the authority of that pastor is slowly stripped away if it ever existed at all.  With so many competing messages that swirl around us, some biblical and some secular, it becomes easier to discount the pastor’s voice as just one more voice among many. 

What the pastor is though, is a fellow Christian called by God through the sacrament of baptism, to serve the neighbor with her unique gifts, talents and life.  This is the starting point of a new beginning for caring for pastors, recognizing that she is a child of God, worthy of the most basic respect and value afforded any neighbor on earth who is created in the image of God.  Luther contends that the pastor is a spiritual father (or mother) and thus the fourth commandment instructs the church how to treat such a person.  

Luther begins his exposition of the fourth commandment in the Large Catechism by affirming the “special position” of mothers and fathers. (BC, LC, 400) He notes that there is no one higher to be praised and loved than father and mother, that they are next to God in terms of deserving honor and deference. (BC, LC, 401) This does not mean that they are perfect.  Not by any stretch of the imagination!  However, they are persons in authority over us; persons who also have a great responsibility to teach us, lead us and nurture us in faith.  Luther asserts that if one wants to do what is pleasing to God, then she must attend to doing what is pleasing to father and mother or whomever is in authority over her.  If we would all adhere to this commandment, “Then all would be well; parents would have more happiness, love, kindness, and harmony in their houses, and children would win their parents’ hearts completely.” (BC,LC, 403) However, obedience is a dirty word these days.  Original sin is alive and well in our churches- we all want to do things our own way and forget who is ultimately in charge (God, not the pastor or the parishioner.) Luther continues by saying that when the devil rules the world then “children forget their parents, as we all forget God.” This concept applies to all those in positions of authority because their authority comes from God alone and is derived from the most basic authority given to parents by God.  

When it comes to spiritual fathers (or mothers), Luther labels those as the people who help to guide Christians in adhering to and dwelling in the Word of God.  He cites St. Paul from 1 Corinthians 4:15 who acknowledges that these fathers do not often receive the honor they deserve but rather are chased out and deprived of bread.  For one to be a Christian, however, Luther posits that we “owe it to God to show ‘double honor’ to those who watch over their souls.” (BC, LC, 408) The promise attached to this is that by caring for the spiritual leaders in our lives God will also care for our needs. Sadly, even in Luther’s day the people did not live up to this commandment when it came to pastors, “here everyone resists and rebels; all are afraid that their bellies will suffer, and therefore they cannot now support one good preacher, although in the past they filled ten fat paunches.” (BC,LC, 408-409) 

As a matter of honoring our pastors there is much we can do to care for them and encourage them to be healthy in mind, body and spirit. In my experience some of the most helpful actions have come from a few conscientious souls who pay close attention to how I carry myself, do I look tired or stressed; to the number of hours they see me in the office, at meetings, at community functions, in the hospital, to which they might say, “Pastor, you need to go home now.  You’ve been here too long and you need to go home and be with your family.” These kind people will also ask me periodically, “When was your last day off? Did you rest or were you busy doing work?” They will push me on my spiritual life asking, “When are you going away to just be with God?” because they know that if I am not attentive to my own spirit then I am virtually useless to them in their spiritual trials. The gifts they give often indicate their concern for my well being: a few days in a cottage in the woods, an overnight stay for my family and me at a local resort, a gift card for a dinner out all signify that they care about my closest relationships. They seem to understand that if those relationships are stressed then I am also ill at ease which affects our life together and my effectiveness as their pastoral leader. 

With those concepts in mind, here is a brief list of do’s and don’ts for any congregation that wants to care for their pastor’s well being which in the long run will benefit the whole faith community:

Don’ts / Dos

Don’t call the pastor after office hours simply to ask a question that can wait until the morning.  Do write yourself a note so you won’t forget to call the pastor at his office in the morning.

Don’t call the pastor on her cell phone and when she doesn’t answer, show up at her house on her day off to discuss the agenda for the next council meeting. Do respect the personal boundaries of the pastor’s home and time off. Pastors often are “on” 24/7 and not by their own choice but rather this is the nature of the call. Over time this takes a toll on pastors. Assume they are enjoying their day off and catch them another time. Some denominations even encourage a sabbatical every six years for the pastor so that their passion for the ministry can be rekindled and they can rest from the demands of their vocational call.

Don’t invite the pastor and his wife out for dinner just to talk about what’s going on at church.  Do invite the pastor and his wife out for a nice meal, buy him a beer and drink one with him, and if you want to go even further- pick up the check!

Don’t just drop in to the office and expect that the pastor is free and available to spend the next two hours with you.  With a sermon to prepare every week, weddings, funerals, baptisms, classes and hospital visits it is likely that he has something he has to get accomplished before the end of the day. Do expect that the pastor may be busy and go ahead and schedule a meeting that is convenient for both of you. 

Don’t tell the pastor that she is misinformed about the bible study she just taught because that is not how someone on television explained it. Pastors are highly trained individuals who have studied many subjects as they prepared for ministry. They continue to study and read.  Do ask them questions and expect to learn from them. They love to teach and engage you in your faith journey. Listen to them and you will be amazed at what they actually do know. 

Don’t exclude the pastor from important decisions about worship, Sunday School curriculum, Vacation Bible School programs, or any other aspect of the ministry in which the pastor has spent years of study and that falls under their purview. Do include the pastor in major decisions regarding curriculum or worship. This where their expertise lies.  Utilize their knowledge and experience to create strong programs.

Don’t call the pastor while they are on vacation just to check and see if she is having a good time. Do pray for the pastor and her family as they go away for rest, relaxation and sabbath. Pray that when she returns she will have renewed energy for the daily tasks of ministry.

Don’t refuse to call the pastor “Pastor” simply because he was just ordained last week. Do ask the pastor what she would like to be called and then honor that as a sign of your respect for her and the pastoral office.

By simply being intentional about honoring our pastors, we can create a healthier environment for the entire congregation to thrive and flourish. Pastors will know they are cared for, and are not simply the hired help, relationships will be stronger, and a deeper level of trust will result amongst all persons in the parish. With healthier congregations will come longer, more fruitful pastorates, less burn out and a decreased incidence of pastors hanging up their stoles for good. 

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

A Letter to Rose


A Letter to my goddaughter...

October 9, 2012

My Dearest Rose,

Before time gets away from me I want to write to you and reflect on your baptism. It is still fresh in my mind since it just happened two days ago on October 7th. It was a beautiful sunny day, a little chilly, but a perfect fall day. Everyone from the family gathered at the church in Monroeville where your aunt Amy (yep, t hat’s me) is the pastor. All of you sat in the front row of the church and another family filled the front row on the other side of the aisle as their baby was being baptized too. Your daddy looked so nice with a tie on that day! He was ready for his baptism as well. It is so neat that the two of your share the same baptismal anniversary. Every year the two of you can remember your special day together!

The time came for your baptism. Your cousin Noah was the acolyte that day, and so he poured the water into the font as I read the prayer that described how God used water to bring life and redemption to the world. First I baptized baby Sydney. She had lots of dark curly hair and I soaked her. She slept right through it! Then it was your turn. Uncle Jeff took you in his arms and held you over the font and I poured the water out of a seashell onto your head, “In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.” You stared at me the whole time, never took your eyes off of me! It was like you were thinking to yourself, “This is the most amazing and wonderful thing I have every seen so far!” It was really precious. When I was done with the water, I kissed you on the forehead. I have NEVER done that to any other baby I’ve baptized. Ever. Of course, you are very special to me, my niece, my goddaughter.


Then I did the same for your daddy, he had water running down his face when it was all over. I guess I got a little wild with the water! 

After that we moved forward to the altar as your cousin Anna sang the first verse of the baptismal hymn from the balcony. “I was there to hear your borning cry. I’ll be there when you are old. I rejoiced the day you were baptized, to see your life unfold.” Uncle Jeff was holding you and you held my index finger tightly in your little hand and wouldn’t let go. I sang the rest of the verse to you as the congregation joined in singing too. Mommy was almost in tears she loves you so much!

After the service we ate cake and went back to our house to eat and play with you and visit with one another. It was a wonderful day. A wonder-full day indeed! God is good and he loves you. I love you. We all love you, Rosebud!

Your loving godmother,

Aunt Amy

Sunday, September 30, 2012

Something Different from STS: How to Make a Newspaper Mask by Anna Little

My ten year old daughter is super crafty and creative! I came home from church today and she was working on a paper mask for Halloween that is made of a Rice Krispie Treat box and some newspapers.

 Step One: Take a cardboard box and draw a mask shape on it.  Anna says to use the rough side of the cardboard for gluing on the paper when you get to that point. The shiny, printed side won't take the glue very well; things get slippery.


Here she is showing the mask shape she made. . . don't forget to cut the eye holes out!


Step Two: Next cut small squares of newspaper, Anna says the ads work best because they are in color!
Wrap the paper squares around a pencil and dip the end in glue.  


Stick them down on to the mask and wait for them to dry.



Step Three: All you have to do then is attach a string to the mask and you are ready for Halloween!  She is going to be the Mysterious Newspaper Girl! She will expose evil and "write off" crime!  Stay tuned for that picture!  

Friday, September 21, 2012

Welcome Children!

Yesterday was a day full of reminders for me about how many adults around us give of themselves so unselfishly to the children around them. This Sunday's lectionary text is Mark 9: 30-37 where Jesus teaches his disciples to welcome children in his name. Whose life do you invest your life in? Is there a child around you who needs your love, attention, support, mentoring, guidance, love?


One of my best friends has devoted her life to serving young people.  Unfortunately she was never able to have children of her own but here's the thing: she has her own children!  Gobs of them!! Children run to her knees. . . even my own daughter when she sees my friend, flies into her waiting arms, ready to tell her all of the events she's experienced since the last time they saw each other. This precious woman has godchildren that she adores, children in the church she serves that are the light of her days, nieces that are her pride and joy, kids at the school where she lives whose ball games she attends on a very regular basis. . . and on and on she goes. The love she has for children can be seen in her green eyes as they twinkle in a child's presence. She gives her life to them, each and every one of them that desires it. . . and I know for sure that they are better off for having her in their lives!

I have another dear friend who happens to be a member of the congregation I serve.  She is a grandmother, having raised two boys into successful adulthood. She could be done with all of this kid stuff, but no. . . a few years ago she saw a need in the community and so she decided she would become a Girl Scout Leader for the young girls who swirled around her! She faithfully invests herself in their little lives and they flock to her like a sweet mother hen who will look after them and correct them when they need it. They love her! She loves them! She has no reason to invest herself so deeply in these 15 girls' lives other than that is who she is in Christ. . . one who welcomes children (despite the enormous chaos!).

I know a sweet man who waits by the front doors of the church every Sunday to see if his favorite girl will walk through the doors early in the morning. He won't sit down until he sees her and she knows that this fellow is her kindred spirit. . . they got to know one another on a mission trip. Their relationship was solidified through service to others. She brought him back to faith. The love they share benefits both of them and inspires the rest of us to give of our selves to others, to form a bond with another human being and make them feel as special as they are.

Now, all of these kids that I'm thinking about come from good homes. And yet, all kids need someone outside of their genetic tree to tell them that they are worthy, valuable, important, special! Mom and Dad have to say those things you see; other adults do not have to say these things. The impact that you make on a child's life just by consistently being there, showing up, asking them about their life, praying for them, welcoming them into your arms. . . this makes us parents very, very happy! It does amazing things for our kids, trust me! We know we cannot do this alone, we need you to help us! It doesn't matter how "good" a child's home is. . . they still need other adults to be in their lives; if a child has a less than "good" home then they need it all the more!



Today I say thanks to all of you who give of yourselves to kids! Teachers, lunch room workers, janitors, pastors, neighbors, brothers and sisters in Christ, coaches, instructors, grandparents, you name it! You are very, very, very important! God Bless you! Please keep up the good work, we are all depending on you!

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Give Thanks in All Circumstances

Have you ever read the The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom? It has been years since I read this true story of a Dutch family that hid Jews in above their watch repair shop and ended up in concentration camps because of their actions. But it is one that I can never forget, especially when I think of the words of Paul who urged believers to "Give thanks in all circumstances." (1 Thessalonians 5:18) In the story Corrie is complaining of how bad things are in the camp and it seems she is losing heart as her sister is ill and they are worried about so many things. Betsy, her sister who is with her in the camp struggling to stay alive, replies with Paul's words.  Corrie cannot understand how her sister can be so upbeat, so hopeful in the face of evil, pain, death and persistently annoying lice that plagued their barracks. She will come to understand later those lice kept the guards away from their crammed quarters which allowed them the freedom to share the Word of God from a tiny bible they managed to smuggle into the camp against their frail, emaciated bodies. This Word of God brought hope, courage and the will to live to many women who otherwise would have certainly given up.

Give Thanks (Photo by Amy Little)

Life can be very hard sometimes.  Circumstances can be very trying. . . especially when they are forced upon us by someone else, when things happen that are not a result of our own doing. Sometimes just living can be a struggle, dealing with demons of the past, or watching things fall apart before our very eyes and realizing that we are helpless to affect the outcome. But Paul instructs us in these matters as well, words that are hard to hear and hard to understand right now, that we are to GIVE THANKS is all circumstances!  ALL circumstances you ask? That's what Corrie asked her sister Betsy.  The answer was "YES! In ALL circumstances." Paul continues by saying, "for this is God's will for you in Jesus Christ."

Give thanks, even when we don't feel like it? Yes.

Give thanks when we are in pain and cannot find relief? Yes then too.

Give thanks when our world is turned upside down and we don't know which was is up? Ummm hmm.

Give thanks when it seems there is nothing to be thankful for? You betcha.

Why? Because you don't know what Jesus is doing behind the scenes. Because you need to give up on fixing everything yourself and fully rely in the One who loves you most and who promised to never leave you! Because God has a bigger plan in mind and it is one that you cannot fathom no matter how you try, it's not rational, it's not reasonable, it's not even understandable-- right now that is (and maybe not in this lifetime!) It's a matter of faith, deep faith. . . and even though things are difficult there is always, always, always something to give thanks for in your life! And maybe you will come to find out that the lice that infest your life are just the thing that God is using to create a new thing!

Give thanks to the Lord for his mercy endures forever. Amen.